Motherhood is a calling

Found this printable on Pinterest check it out here!

The other day I read this amazing article about the worlds view of being a parent and our attitudes and thought I would share it here with you. I have been struggling lately with finding the right balance of time for the Lord, my spouse, my kids, myself and everything else in my life and I feel like this article was exactly what I needed to be reminded of. I love how it talks about how becoming a mother is like a kind of dying, a dying of ourselves, but also a chance to live a better life than ever possible without becoming a mother. I always tell my friends who are having their first child to not try to rush having that baby too soon because they will never ever not be a parent again, and to cherish those last days of just having to worry about yourself. I don't mean this in a bad way at all, it is just a reality! Once you hold your newborn baby or the adoption becomes legalized that person is tied to you forever. There will never again be a moment in your life where you don't think about that child and whether you are doing enough.

I often hear women comment on how they have lost themselves because of being a mom and I always think, no you have found a new you! You have discovered a you that is (hopefully) unselfish, responsible, compassionate, patient, a teacher, a friend, a counselor, a cheerleader, a supporter and a million more things. Somewhere over the past year I have lost sight of that and became focused on me more than my family and over the past two months as I have refocused my priorities and obligations and have removed the fog that was over my brain I have found a new joy in my life!

I have found that as I put my kids and God first I find that I am less interested in "me" time and more interested in time with them. Earlier today was my definition of perfect as M & J were at school and O, N, and I were cuddling on the couch and singing "EIEIO" (aka Old McDonald had a Farm) over and over and over and hearing the laughs from O and N as we tickled and made funny animal songs. Then later after school was over and N was down for a nap, T was helping J and M with homework, I was folding laundry and O was laying at my feet I just felt a peace and joy to be a part of this family I helped create. I am disappointed in myself that I lost sight of that. I strongly encourage you to read the article, it is very short, and really internalize what it says and see where you can improve!

Everything is a choice

For those of you who do not know I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and twice a year we have what is called General Conference where we hear great and inspiring messages from the Prophet and apostles of our church. I absolutely love General Conference and I always hear exactly what I need to hear while watching it. One of the talks given was all about choices and I don't remember the exact quote or even who gave the talk so for my fellow church member if you remember please leave a comment so i can give credit and the exact quote. Anyways, he said something along the lines that we don't arrive at our destiny by chance but by the choices we make.

I knew this already, I teach this to my children on a regular basis, but for some reason when he said those words it was like a glass of ice cold water was thrown in my face and I stopped and took stock on the choices I was making. I thought about how often my kids would ask me to play with them and I would tell them after I cleaned up something or after I finished reading the chapter (which sometimes ended up being after I finish this book) or after I finish this show or . . . well you get the picture. I laid there and thought about all the choices I had been making in my life lately.

I then began thinking about how this applies to being a parent and a spouse. How often do we give our children choices and expect them to make the correct choices but then we make the poor choice? Did you know that it is your choice to get angry or frustrated with a screaming 2 yr old or you can choose to stay calm and help teach that screaming 2 yr old how to properly channel their emotions? Did you know it is your choice to lose your temper or to keep your head? Did you know you can choose to teach your children to behave appropriately through love and being an example rather than through fear?

You choose what kind of parent you will be and only you. It isn't your mom or dad or your spouse or your best friend or your church leader. It is you and only you! So ask yourself what kind of parent do you want to be? Do you want your children to be afraid of you? Do you want your children to always feel loved and cherished? Do you want to be a patient, kind, but firm mom? Do you want to be a doormat? Do you want to be their boss? Do you want to be their friend, their confidant, or their enemy? The choice is yours to make and yours alone and your actions will always tell on you!


I would love for you to leave a comment stating what kind of parent or even teacher you want to choose to be and what changes you are going to have to make to be that person!

Motivational Monday: The best reasons for being a Mom!

I recieved this a long time ago and I have it on my fridge so I can see it everyday!

The best reasons for being a Mom:

Glimpses of God everyday.
More love than your heart can hold.
Butterfly kisses and Velcro hugs.
A hand to hold.
Endless wonder of rocks, ants, and clouds.
A partner for blowing bubbles, flying kites,
building sand castles, and skipping in the rain.
You get to finger paint, carve pumpkins, play
hide and seek, catch lightning bugs, and never
stop believing in Santa Clause.
You get a front row seat to witness history:
first step, first word, first date, first bra, first
time behind the wheel.
You have the power to heal a booboo, scare
away monsters, police a slumber party, and
patch a broken heart.
In the eyes of a child, you rank up there with God.
Author unknown.

To download a pdf format of this go here

 

I hope everyone had an amazing Mother's Day yesterday and continue to feel loved every day!

Motivation Monday: Be an example

I have been thinking a lot lately about teaching my children, and the things that come naturally when teaching them and the things that are a little bit harder to teach them and as I have been thinking about this I have realized that the more I am already doing something in my life, the easier it is to teach them and vice versa. For example, I enjoy a clean house, I don't like living in filth, and when I say clean I don't mean a picked up house, but a really clean counters scrubbed, floors mopped, shelves dusted clean house. I don't always have a house that is this clean because I have four children and I don't think they should be neglected just so I can have a spotless house all the time, but I love cleaning my house and seeing it sparkle. Because I love that so much, I have been able to teach my kids to clean, and enjoy cleaning as well and the way I did that was by being an example to them. If my kids are cleaning, most likely my husband and I are cleaning as well - we might not be cleaning what they are cleaning, but we are all cleaning as a family. How unfair would it be to them if I expected them to clean all day and wasn't willing to do the same? In fact, my kids will often comment on how much they love having a clean house as well! The same principle applies to hygiene, eating healthy, being active, and reading to name a few. If I already have those habits instilled in myself it is a lot easier for me to teach those habits to my kids.

Now the same principle applies when it comes to the harder things to teach, if I don't have the knowledge or the habits already formed it is a lot harder for me to teach my kids those things. For example, I struggle with reading my scriptures every day; I try to do it every day but it seems like something comes up, or I fall asleep, or I forget and so it is hard for me to teach my children the value and importance of daily scripture study. One thing my husband and I have done is incorporated nightly scripture reading in with story time at bedtime and because we have made that part of the routine my kids will remind us to read them, so as a family we are working on creating that habit together. Another thing I have a hard time teaching my kids is gardening. The other day we went to home depot to get some parts for a toy my husband bought and while we were there the kids asked to look at the plants. After looking we walked out and J asked me why I didn't buy any plants. I told him it was because I kill plants, I am the worse at keeping plants alive, and he was so sad because he really wanted to go home and plant some plants in the backyard. I am a horrible gardener - I literally know absolutely nothing about gardening and therefore I cannot teach my kids how to garden. We can learn together - which I might do next year when I don't have a newborn baby whom I love to cuddle all day - but because I don't have that knowledge I cannot share it with them.

So big deal right, I can't teach my kids how to garden and am not the best at teaching them to read their scriptures every day, but what does that have to do with anything? Really nothing, it is the principle that matters - you cannot teach your kids something you don't do. Kids learn from watching others, especially those older than them and adults and they will mimic what they see, so if you want your kids to grow up to be a healthy, normal, well rounded adult that means you have to be a healthy well rounded adult. If you want your kids to learn the value of family, you need to show them how much you value family. If you want them to learn how to clean and be clean, you need to clean and be clean. If you want them to be a hard worker then you have to be a hard worker. If you want them to have a good marriage you need to have a good marriage. The list goes on and on and on.

So my challenge for you this week is to really look at yourself, what are your strengths? What are your weaknesses? What do you value? Do your actions match the words you are preaching to your kids? Make a list on a piece of paper of the traits you want your kids to have as they grow up and then rate yourself on how well you have those traits - no one has to see this but you so BE HONEST!!! Then after you have taken a good hard look at yourself, determine one thing you want your kids to learn and you don't know how to do and make a commitment to learn how to do that. It might be something like learning how to cook so you can teach your kids, or it may be learning to forgive and forget. Remember kids learn from our actions more than our words so as parents we need to be make sure our actions match our words!

Motivational Monday: getting motivated

Man life with a new baby is tiring! My husband is still home and helping out a ton, but waking up in the middle of the night to feed my princess and then getting up and helping my husband with the house and kids is really exhausting. Right now all I want to do is go lay in bed, with a good book, and read until I fall asleep and sleep until it is time to feed N again. But I digress that isn't an option because my hubby took N to the hospital for her PKU test and I am here with my boys, who are my current motivation for staying awake.

As I was thinking about what to blog about today I was thinking about how hard it is to get motivated to do something (clean the house, exercise, etc) and how a lot of times my sheer drive alone pushes me forward, I want to have a clean house, hot bod, well behaved kids, and so in spite of the voice in my head that says; "go back to bed, you deserve it" or worse for me sometimes "it's no big deal to spend all day on the computer, your kids are behaving" I force myself to put the laptop away, to get up and get going and it always amazes me at how once I get going I can keep going and get so much accomplished. Right now it is harder as my body adjusts and recovers from birth, so I learn my limits and focus on my main purpose in life - to be an amazing wife and mom - and it keeps me going.

What motivates you to get up and get going? Do you have an expression you recite to yourself? Do you give yourself mini-breaks? I am genuinely curious about the different ways you stay motivated in life!