How to handle a 2 yr old tantrum without losing your cool

I have a 2 yr old who I love to pieces. He is the funniest, craziest, cutest 2 yr old on the planet, and I'm not just saying that because I'm his mom, it's the truth. This kid seriously is awesome. That is until he gets tired and he gets angry and he can't handle the emotions so he has a 2 yr old meltdown. You all saw the video I posted of his tantrum a few weeks ago all because he wanted to get M out of school after we dropped off J and that wasn't an option. When he gets mad he gets really mad and he goes insane. It is like a little monster emerges out of his body and he is no longer my sweet angel but my insane devil child.

As I have mentioned in previous posts I haven't been my normal awesome self as of lately and am slowly refinding myself and becoming the patient, understanding mom I used to be before having raging hormones from pregnancy and nursing. So while I was in my funk and O would begin having his tantrum I would immediately feel my body tense up and prepare to go to battle with this two yr old. I would carry him to his room, yell at him, close the door and then hold it closed because he wouldn't stay in there on his own. Well the other day he began melting down and losing his mind and as I began to feel my body tense up I immediately stopped myself and thought, "Kim you are 28, he is 2! I am not going to engage in this battle with him" so instead I walked over to him, picked him up and carried him to his bed to remove him from the situation (which probably had something to do with his older brother bothering him) and then I laid down next to him, held him in my arms and began singing. At first he tried to fight me because he thought I was going to react the way I had been reacting the previous 6 months. But after the first two lines of twinkle, twinkle little star he slowly began to calm down and let me just hold him. I sang a couple more songs with him until he was completely calmed down and then I told him I loved him, and asked him if he was ready to be a happy nice boy or if he still needed me to sing him some songs. He said he wanted to be happy and nice so we walked out of his room together and he was happy once again.

The moral of that story is this: the key to handling a tantrum is first, to remember you are the adult and have a lifetime of experience to learn how to handle your emotions whereas your child is still learning how to handle their emotions; second is to remove them from the cause, and third shower them with love and patience and give them the time they need to calm down.

What are your tips for handling tantrums without losing your cool?

Life Happens sometimes

Wow life sure has been busy over here, so busy in fact that I just realized today that I had not thought about or typed on this blog in a week! I try not to go too long between posts, however this week was M's dance concert so we had dress rehearsal at her studio on Monday, then technical rehearsal on Thursday, dress rehearsal on Friday and Concert on Saturday - thankfully J was done with basketball so I didn't have to worry about getting him to practice or games. I love having my kids in extracurricular activities BUT I am also extremely grateful that we don't have anything until September and then I am going to try to put J and M into the same gymnastics class and not mention the word t-ball or basketball to J and hopefully then life won't be too hectic! On top of that life with a 4 month old who has RSV has definitely made life a bit harder because we are doing breathing treatments for thirty minutes at a time several times a day. My sister in law is sending us some essential oils to try and I am hoping they work to clear up her cough and congestion because it is really bad and she coughs so hard she wakes herself up at night so I'm not getting a lot of sleep. And that is what life as a parent is about sometimes, busy!

So on to a parenting experience for you:

This morning we were getting ready for church and J accidentally knocked over my purse and a bag of Wheat Thins fell out of my purse. He was so excited and showed me, I told them that they were not to be eaten and to put them back in my purse while we finish getting ready for church. I expect my children to obey me so I then left the room and gave N a bath for church. After bathing her I heard the kids playing in a way that sounded like they needed to be checked on (you know the sound) so I found them hiding in my bathroom with their hands behind their backs and something in their mouth. I told them to show me their hands and when they did I saw that they had gotten into the Wheat Thins. So I said, "I guess since you guys chose to eat my snack out of my purse without my permission you don't need snacks at church today." Then I walked away from the sounds of utter outrage! My kids came chasing after me and were begging for one more chance to please show me that they could listen and I sad, "I already gave you a chance when I told you to put them back in my purse and not eat them, since you chose to eat them now I will not be bringing any snacks to church. You may have snacks next week as long as you don't make the same choice again." So M thinking she is smart says, "Well we are just going to beg the whole time until you give in." My response to that was, "That's fine with me, I am the queen of ignoring!" They then proceeded to beg, scream, plead, throw themselves at my feet and I proceeded to ignore them completely - face and all - while I finished getting everything ready to eat. After a few minutes M says to J and O, "She really is the queen of ignoring" and they stopped their attempts at changing my minds and guess what they survived the whole 3 hours of church without one snack! Well O had snacks in nursery but you know what I mean. And I can guarantee that they won't be sneaking things out of my purse again. That ladies and gents is how you give logical consequences and tantrums.Any questions?